it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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