If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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