Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
