tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
