it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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