i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
