How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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