these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
