she looked like the bat from fern gully.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
soo... how was my night?
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