I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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