we're blogging at a bar
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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