Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
It's blow job season.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
