We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
