If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
