Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
