Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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