Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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