i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Michael Bay diarrhea
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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