he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
