I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
You have to summon your inner elephant
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize
