So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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