im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Randomize
