she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
