I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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