I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i just google imaged poop.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
