I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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