I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize