Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
operation have a gay friend backfired
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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