That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize