I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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