Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
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