By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
