Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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