i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize