somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Randomize
