Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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