I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Randomize