Kareoke will never be a sober sport
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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