Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
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