You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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