found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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