do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
