Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
