I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
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Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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