Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
