its not stalking. its research.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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