who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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