I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I understand Curling. That high.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Randomize
