I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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