I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
