trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
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